Secret Single Behavior

Josh left me. For 5 days he went to Arizona to do God knows what (enjoy 90 degree temps and sunshine) with God knows who (his aunts for a day and then his bff for the rest of the time). Well, lucky for him I’m a.) not needy and b.) kind of happy to have a few days to myself. Is that bad? I mean, I love him. Dearly. And I love living with him (most of the time). But I’m really independent and sometimes I just need space. I think it’s healthy to have some time away from your significant other once in a while (that’s a whole other story for a whole other post).

While Josh was away, I engaged in some “Secret Single Behavior.” What is SSB, you ask? Urban Dictionary defines it as:

A term originating from the television show Sex and the City, a SSB is an action or habit that one indulges in only when alone. This refers especially to behavior that is hidden from one’s significant other and could be potentially embarrassing (or disastrous) if discovered.

Now, nothing I do would be “disastrous” if Josh found out, but there are some things I’m only comfortable doing when he’s gone. Gotta keep a little mystery, right? Without further ado, here are a few of my SSBs!

-Sporting dots of pimple cream all over my (apparently 13 year old) face. Ps, when does acne stop? Because I’m pretty sure I’m 25 and have the same amount of pimples as I did when I was in middle school.

-Going to the bathroom with the door open. Liberating. Try it sometime.

-Eating “non-meals.” Non-meals consist of small amounts of a lot of random foods eaten for breakfast, lunch or dinner. For example, the other day for lunch I had “guacamole” (it’s in quotes because it was really just a mashed up avocado, salt and lime juice) and chips, a lemon square (courtesy of Jess), some carrots and hummus, and some leftover tortellini from dinner the night before. I could have just stopped with the tortellini, but no. Also, I’m pretty sure I didn’t have dinner that night.

-Eating in bed. Terrible habit. Usually chips. Definitely something that will result in crumbs in the sheets.

-Watching marathons of the Real Housewives of Anywhere. I can usually get Josh to sit through one episode so the fact that I can watch like, TEN episodes? Is awesome.

-Vlogging. Because I refuse to do it while Josh is in the house.

-No shaving! Again, so liberating.

-Full-blown Beyonce dance routines. This one is my favorite. I sense your judgement and I don’t care. I am Emily Fierce.

When I Googled “secret single behavior” I came across this great article from The Frisky. Definitely check it out if you want a really good laugh (and be sure to read the comments!).

Ok girls, your turn! What is your Secret Single Behavior?

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20 Responses to Secret Single Behavior

  1. haniemarie says:

    I kept thinking you were saying BSB at first and was like, heck yes I’ll blast BSB if P isn’t home! Enjoy your liberation sista 🙂

  2. Mrs. JYW says:

    LOVE LOVE ME TIME!

    I eat all meals on the couch, in my pjs, with my face on from the night before (eyes smeared with mascara and all) and by MEALS, I mean a hodge podge of random cravings and snacks.

    Baths, mani/pedi’s, plucking, etc.

    Watching horrible amounts of horrible reality tv.

    Taking two naps a day.

    Blasting the iPod stereo and dancing/cleaning the house in my undies.

  3. Shannon says:

    I watch a ridiculous amount of wedding shows and trash tv and I may skip a shower or two (assuming I’m not going out in public anywhere).

  4. Maria says:

    When Ale was out of town for a month at a time, not going to lie: it was all sorts of AWESOME! You taught me a new acronym today, I wasn’t aware my goofy habits were SSB. And no shaving, heck yes! Fist bump to that!

  5. Amy says:

    I am in total agreement with you–I love my husband but we’re both independent so I don’t mind a few days alone every now and then! As far as SSB goes, I gotta say…there’s not a lot I hide from Brad. We’re going on 8 years together, I’m pretty sure he’s seen it all, hahaha!

  6. Laura L says:

    I’m like you. I love having that time to be alone. I just house/dog sat for my parents for a week and a half, and although I would go home to get more clothes, visit Brad, etc. or he would come over for dinner I was alone every night. And it was awesome. I could stalk the hell out of people on Facebook. Craft. Talk on the phone obnoxiously. Watch all the shows he doesn’t care to watch. And just not worry about it. Eat when I’m hungry, not when we’re both. I could go on. It was like dating again. I will say this… I was SO happy to climb into bed with him last night for the first time in a while!

  7. Steph says:

    Perfect timing! I just wrote a post about how mine and Scot’s schedule’s are pretty different now, and just starting out? It’s throwing my routine off and I don’t know what to do at night. Give me a week and I”ll be set 😉

    But! Totally agree the open bathroom door thing. And eating in bed. I also think it’s perfectly acceptable to have ice cream for dinner.

  8. LatteLove says:

    love it. I’m all about the SSB. (especially the dance party and eating junky food)
    the only bad part is I always stay up waaaay too late indulging myself. the only time I got to bed on time is if he’s home!

  9. Stacy Marie says:

    Oh I love it! Ryan is out of town lots of weekends for cross country/track meets and it rocks. I go on dates with my sisters, sleep in, let the dogs cuddle with me in bed, and like you, put the razor away!

  10. Cara says:

    I love SSBs and me time! I also eat non-meals/snacks, watch reruns of SatC or Gilmore Girls, craft, prolong showering, and sit around in my towel for at least an hour post-shower.

  11. andrea s says:

    love this. with hubby and i having been long distance for 3-4 of our almost 9 years together- the me time separate from we time is coveted from time to time and it is lovely. since when we are together we enjoy just hanging out and keeping each other company so i enjoy doing the things that are fun to do when my attention isn’t needed to be directed to us being a couple. in no order what so ever i enjoy reading, blogging, FB’ing, and if gone for a weekend {2-3+ away} i totally rock NO MAKEUP, the same outfit {PJs} for days- even after showering, yup still the PJs, messy hair, staying in bed as long as possible watching all of the TV shows that he can’t stand me watching {Teen Mom} haha… i also love falling asleep to movies on the couch while he’s away…

    dang, when is he going out of town next!? 😉

  12. Laura says:

    YES! Love this post. Peeing with the door open and not shaving are two of the awesome perks of David traveling a lot. Oh, and grabbing dinner on my way home and eating on the couch while I watch my DVRed shows. Ahh, so nice. 🙂

  13. hemborgwife says:

    I very rarely get time alone because of our situation but I am starting to feel bad for my husband because I very rarely close the door when going to the bathroom when he is home and Ionly shave my legs twice a month most of the year! The rare chance I am alone though I make my meals like a French picnic, cheese and salami and wine, and watch movies like Lost in Translation.

  14. Jessica says:

    Um, I totally pee with the door open all the time. And in the dark.
    I should probably clarify that I don’t do that around company.

    I’m glad you enjoyed the lemon bars my friend!! 😀

  15. I just, love you. In all of your awesomeness. When Elliot is gone, I turn on Lifetime and watch it all day, drink in the morning, eat cake for breakfast, do my silly work out DVD’s, have FULL ON conversations with Oscar (I’m talking hour long), paint my nails without the windows open and take a nap. It’s just fabulous.

  16. Alyssa says:

    HA! I love this post.
    I also can definitely appreciate alone time, even though I love my hubs to pieces.
    Some of my SSB? Indulging in hideous shows like Keeping up with the Kardashians… Say Yes to the Dress…. or listening to really obnoxious rap music while cleaning. Nothing too scandalous, but you know!

  17. Layla says:

    Ah, crap. I do all of this in front of Josh. Seriously, why is he even married to me??? I should save this stuff for when he’s gone.

  18. OMG I LOVE non-meals! Thank God I don’t work at home or I’d gain so much weight from eating non-meals all day. My other SSB is watching X-Men movies and Rom-Coms b/c those are movies I can’t talk J into watching with me.

  19. Katie says:

    Gah, I do many of these things, especially dancing around the apartment! Lol…gotta dance it out, baby! And, like Claire, I tend to make a cocktail/pour a glass of wine or two before Justin gets home…naughty.

    Although, come to think of it – Justin has not ever been AWAY for more than just a day…during the day…never a night. What?!? I know…we got married almost a year ago and we have not spent a single night apart yet. That sounds weird.

  20. I’m probably a bad wife, but I go to the bathroom with the door open and go days (okay, to be honest, maybe weeks in the winter) without shaving. Apparently my secret single behavior isn’t so secret. Oops!

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